The Chronicles of Ardia: Vol. 1

In our church, we usually refer to each other as “Brother” or “Sister” and then use their last name (Like, “Hello Sister Jones, how are you today?”). I tell you this because I am about to introduce you to Sister Ard. She has a full name, but I’ll just call her by what I called her while working for her – Sister Ard. You may read some things here that you won't believe, but be asured, this is all true.

On a cool, September Saturday morning in my sophomore year of college, just before heading out the door for the day, I was saying a prayer. I was praying that I could find a job. As I finished up and ran out the door, a very long, large, and brown Buick pulled into my apartment parking lot. The kind of car, that when you were twelve, you and your friends yelled, “Land Yacht!” when it drives past. A woman was driving, (dog by her side) wearing a neck brace and looking around intently. I would later find out that Sister Ard wore a neck brace, “just in case.” You will find, that she did many things, “just in case.”

She pulled up in front of me and asked if I needed a job. A job? “Why, this is what I was just praying for”, I thought to myself. “Yes!”, I said, and with that, she gave me directions to her house: “Just out of town, by the airport.” The airport? Does Rexburg have an airport? You have to understand just how small this little town is, or was. I haven’t been back for ten years, or so. But at any rate, if you blink, you miss it.

I wish you could have seen her. She always wore mauve, pink, lavender or baby blue. Those were her colors. All made out of polyester, and I still had to iron each and every item, using a “sleeve” ironing board on her shirts. (more on this contraption later) Isn’t this why polyester was invented, so we don’t have to iron? And she had the kind of glasses that the lenses came down onto her cheeks. Her lips kind of curled up as she would scrunch her nose to look at you through her glasses, and keep them on her nose. And she would NEVER leave the house without her hair done, eyebrows painted on, (they are the “picture frame of the face” after all) and Buddy in the car with her. (you can guess, Buddy is her dog; The kind that’s in family portraits.)

I would start after classes the following Monday. As I arrived, I drove into a circular neighborhood full of once very nice, 1970’s homes. They we’re kept up, and in “the day”, I’m sure this was “the place” to live. As I reached the front doors, I read a little hand written note, taped to the front door: (this would be the first of many little notes I would find taped around her house) “If we don’t answer, we’re around back in the garden.” Really? Every time you don’t answer? The note was well worn, obviously not put there just for me. There were layers of tape on it and the paper was yellowing. This little piece of paper was my first clue into the humorous, loving, and a little crazy life of Sister Ard.

I must tell you, before I go on and reveal all the secrets of Sister Ard, that I truly love her. She taught me SO very much. Yes, I did have to roll my eyes A LOT! And I always had great stories to tell my roommates, who waited anxiously to hear what kind of crazy thing happened that day in the life of a Helper Girl. (this was my job title) But over all, Sister Ard was a great lady who loved me, and I really did love her.

Note: This, like many of my posts, will be an ongoing affair. Please stay tuned weekly to The Chronicles of Ardia, as well as weekly crafts, wedding tips, and everyday life around the Big Blue House.